17
Aug
10

Politician Found Guilty of “Lying”; All Hell Breaks Loose in Washington

Former Illinois governor Rod Blagojevich has been found guilty of the crime of “lying.” Other politicians react:

Barack Obama: “Wait. We can get busted for that? I quit.”

George W. Bush: “Oh shit.”

Bill Clinton: “I did not have sexual relations with that woman, Hillary Clinton. Seriously. Chelsea’s dad is Rip Torn.”

Nancy Pelosi: “Go fuck yourself, pleb.”

John Lewis: “Hold on. When I said I was surrounded by rabid Tea Party types who were screaming racial epithets at me on the Capitol steps, I meant exactly the opposite of that. I wasn’t ‘lying’ so much as I was uh… Aw hell.”

Zombie Ronald Reagan: “BRAAAAAAAAAAAAIIIIIIIIINNNNNNNNNSSSSSSS.”

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